Thursday, July 10, 2008
Alkaselzter and Lemons
They do like to laugh. And so I laughed to and tried to give the kids hugs.
When life hands you lemons, make lemonade.
Sunday, June 15, 2008
Ya.
In other news,
I just visited my site. It´s beautiful. I like to call it Macau. Situated on a random island in Bocas, it´s perfect for surfing. Imagine walking down snow white beaches, seeing a perfect wave break and having idealic huts in the background.
And then if you zoom in your camera just a bit, you might see a gringa that the people there call Chamie. She´s content smiling, eating a steaming bowl of bananas and coconut rice.
Of course it´s not complete paradise. The community of 150 has 1 latrine. It´s situated over a tiny river. It actually has 4 latrines if you include the ones located at the school, but they get locked on the weekend. The site lacks electricity. So there´s no cold beer waiting for you after a long day of surfing. And cows wander and poop on the beach so you have to watch your steps and dodge the pies.
But the people are happy here. They do want to work. They want to learn English because they realize that learning it will increase their job opprotunities. And so for the time being I will be the maestra de ingles in the school. I am teaching the English classes in the school everyday, and classes for adults in the community Monday and Friday for 2 hours each.
Right now the community wants me to help them fix the aqueduct and build the latrines. I´m definatley more than happy to help build the latrine. As for the aqueduct, I´m completely clueless. I´ve never taken a engineering class in my life. But I do know that larger pipes will decrease water pressure, not increase it (like the aqueduct committee thinks).
But it´s peaceful here. I know my neighbors already and I have hours to talk and learn from them each day.
But in the meantime.... Please send me email. I know it sounds like a desperate request, but I only come into town every once in a while and it can be a little disheartening to realize that no one emails. It´s: jamie_konecny@hotmail.com
Peace.
Monday, June 02, 2008
Poverty
I don’t need to describe the community much, there were latrines, and running water, but the community was either at or below the poverty line.
I still have a hard time of understanding how some people could be so poor and yet so happy. I suppose it throws the whole money=happiness right out the window And the thought that me helping them “improve” their lives would somehow decrease their happiness has definitely crossed my mind more than once…
They are so poor and I want to help. I want to help teach them what I have learned and I know I’ll be learning a lot in the process. I guess it boils down to that: I have learned so much, so how could I not help others with the knowledge I have??
Sunday, May 25, 2008
Saturday, May 17, 2008
Panama....the experience
It’s definitely a lifestyle change when your host family is worried when you’re not home by nine….and usually that was the time that you left the house to go out.
Poco a poco I’m getting used to grabbing fresh fruit off a tree, riding a pimped out old school bus for public transport, cold showers, and telenovas.
I do like Panama for all of you sitting there scratching your heads and wondering. I like that I live in a really small town. I like that my host family here is so big, so close, and I’m introduced to others as their daughter. I like that I can read a Spanish newspaper and know what it is saying. I like that when I go to tech classes and during break I can go play with Pepe the monkey. And I like that my family is constantly teaching me new things. For example: today I’m killing a chicken for a party. Every day is a new experience and a chance for me to learn something new.
Even though my life is constantly changing, I’ve been struck by one other constant in my life: God. Last night while trying to fall asleep I was listening to a song and I realized how true the words were. It goes something like this:
All the things my feet thought to be firm
Are falling with urgency
Tearing back my false sense of security
Some say, “Things change, nothing stays the same”
But the sweetness in my ears
Safe in your arms
Speak the words I love to hear
You have been more faithful
Than the morning sun
You have been more faithful
Than knowing night will come
You have been more faithful
Than the changing of seasons
All the things I thought
That I used to know
Falling down again
Our disillusionment is how we grow
Some say, “Things change, nothing stays the same”
In a world of inconsistency
Everything’s the now
What causes my heart to believe?
You have been more faithful…..
Friday, May 09, 2008
It;s not official yet
....for surfers.
I know. You can all be jealous now.
The only problem is, I¨ve never surfed a day in my life.
It´s not official; I¨ll find out the final say on Wenesday....
But it´s kinda cool.
Monday, May 05, 2008
Malaria Medication Dreams
I was in Michelle¨s ice cream shop (which is a 50¨s ice cream shop that is kinda decorated like Victoria¨s Secret) and I was looking at all the ice cream.
And I got 4 scoops of chocolate ice cream. And I remember thinking that that was alot of ice cream.
And then I woke up in 90 degree weather under a mosquito net.
Ah, Panama, I love you and your weather and lack of ice cream
Wednesday, April 09, 2008
A story that can only be told through Paint
Thursday, April 03, 2008
I'm just gonna throw this out there. If you don't like it you can just throw it right back.
We celebrated Earth Hour by having the party lit by LED headlamps and candles. But the best part was how many of my friends showed up. One of my friends flew up from Ohio, one came down from Fo Co, another was in town from Florida. It's good to know that you are loved and will be missed.
So now I'm just trying to get everything done. I have a feeling that I'll be "that girl" who doesn't know how to pack or just completely overpacks everything. After bumming around China in a daypack for 3 weeks, I know I can pack right. Sometimes I just don't want to.
Auggh. Sorry this is so random. I guess my mind is going a million miles a minute and I keep thinking of things I need to do and somehow am still trying to process how to say goodbye to everyone.
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
My dad believes in love at first sight.
I guess my dad does. Because that's how he described it.
My parents have been in love for 30 years. Next week is their 30th anniversary. The thing is they're still in love with eachother, madly in love. It wasn't uncommon for me growing up to walk into the kitchen and find my parents making out. Yeah, a little gross and slightly disconcerting. But life hasn't always been easy on my parents. They've had to deal with cancer twice, my dad going partially blind, living in the Philippines, and well the list goes on. I've never heard my mom complain about my dad and I don't think I've really seen them argue in front of me. All I've ever seen is their love.
And the thing is, it's what I want to strive for. I never want to settle for second best or even third. I don't want third string junior varsity, I want the starter on varsity. In other words, I want the best. I look at alot of relationships around me and I see them settling. Scared that they'll never find their soulmate, they go with the warmest body around.
Most of the guys in the general population I find pretty boring. The do the same things, like the same things and are pretty predictable. Maybe that's why I'm drawn to the off-beat guys who do their own thing. They have stories about their adventures and I'm drawn to an adventurous guy who isn't always constrained by society's norms. I like different.
So to sum it up, I don't believe in love at first sight mainly because I've never felt that way before towards anyone.
Maybe it does exist. Or maybe, like most things, it develops slowly over time getting richer and better.
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
The Wall
Last night I sat in gravel and stared at a wall for a couple of hours.
And no, I wasn't high.
The wall is covered in rocks with multicolored bits of tape stuck next to it.
And I sat staring. Figuring out a red route, a black route, and my nemesis green.
Once you pick your color, you follow the problem through, figuring your left, right hands, where you're gonna match feet, when you should throw in a heel hook or a dyno.
You see the end goal.
Life's not like that though. In life you stare at your climbing wall looking at a bunch of various colors, you pick your route, and you have no idea where the route will end.
Tuesday, March 04, 2008
I think I might loathe you....
See for a while, things were working out. I had my doubts especially since I'm leaving in a couple of weeks and I didn't think it would really work out long-distance wise.
But I said "What the hell?" and did it anyways. Throwing caution to the wind, I checked you out, learned more about you, and then decided to go for it. (Besides, you were cute)
And for a while, things were good. We went to the movies and you didn't interrupt me once. (Which was a refreshing change). We had the lunch dates, the dirty dive bar times, and when I thought it was working, I challenged you on the slopes.
You kept up. You didn't slack. You kept your promises and didn't disappoint.
Then last week, you decided that we weren't working out. You started forgetting things, things that were really, really important to me. And it wasn't just forgetting the small things, it was also dropping the ball when I needed you most.
Yes, I know people recommended you highly to me. But the sad thing is, I can't go back to the way things were. I'm kinda stuck with you for the moment, and I'm just waiting for the chance for me to move and forget you.
So this post is dedicated to you, my blackberry pearl 8100, Cause I think I might loathe you.
Friday, February 29, 2008
So it finally had to happen.
You know when you realize what you are about to do and you're half terrified and half so pumped to do it? Yeah.
I dropped my brother off at the airport and thought "this is the last time I'm gonna see him for two years." Which just made my mind ramble into all the other last things I'll get to do before I leave.
And then, I pretty much hyperventilated.
What if I threw a party and no one came? What if I hated it there? What if people don't remember me? What if everything is so foreign when I return?
A quick phone call to Ang that went pretty much like "Are you f-ing kidding me?!?! Snap out of it! Of course it won't be horrible"
And then I remembered that I'm also excited. Yeah, there's stuff I can't do, but there is so much other stuff that I could do there. (Like becoming an amazing surfer, using a machete, getting a sweet tan, living in a rainforest.....oh and helping people too)
So I snapped out of it and for now I'm just being. Living in the moment and enjoying it for all it's worth.
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
I'm leaving.
And for once, I just want you to listen.
I don't want to hear about your relationship problems.
I don't want to over analyze a comment or an email.
I'm saying good-bye to life I've always known,
And saying hello to one I don't.
I'm packing up and moving on.
And for once, I just want to talk.
I want to talk about how excited
I will be,
How nervous I am,
How I am going to miss the most important
events in those lives around me.
I just want to talk about
saying good-bye
And for once I want you to just sit there
And not criticize me,
Not to judge me,
And not to tell me how to pack.
I want to talk about my feelings
(And I don't do this very much)
But for once,
Can you just listen
And let me cry
on your shoulder instead?
Monday, February 11, 2008
Update
$250 on a phone. Yes, you can start yelling at me now. But technically it was a present from Mummy & Daddy, so really I didn't spend that money at all.
$80 on skiing. It was an all day event and tons of fun. From a money standpoint, not the best thing to spend my dolla bills on, but from a physical & physcological standpoint, well worth it. Plus my brother is coming into town and I have to be better than him once I hit the slopes.
$15 going out. Pretty cheap, considering it covered 2 beers, appetizers, a cover charge, and two nights of fun.
I've only gone out to eat a couple of times and I'm learning how to make my lunch!!!! Small victory for me, but still a victory.
So yeah, still learning on how to live on half my income, but my savings account is looking amazing and I'm not starving to death.
Monday, February 04, 2008
Change.
Some friends and I went to watch "The Devil Came on Horseback" an independent film regaring the genocide in the Darfur region of Sudan. It's one thing to see fake gory violence, it's another to see an image of a child who was burned to death. I never cry when I see movies and usually never cry in general. So why was I so moved by this?
It's because it's injustice. It's wrong. When we as people are not moved by horrific images, there is something wrong with our society.
How can we see injustice and not act against it? If we fail to act, essentially we are like the German citizens of the 1930's who knew about the concentration camps and did nothing.
In the past I would hear about programs such as Displace Me or even (Red), but I never bothered to do anything about it. In fact, I criticized the programs and even the people who would participate in them citing that the programs were not sustainable, poorly run, etc. I would get on my high horse using example after example of programs that essentially hurt the people groups that the NGO's were trying to help. **most of these examples were pulled from "A Bed for the Night"
Wow. How much a view can change after traveling to a 2nd world country and coming face to face with the problems that you have been critiquing from the cushy chairs of a bohemian coffee shop.
You know, even though a program or solutions to a problem are not ideal, at least it's something. It might not be sustainable, but it works for the here and now. (And if any of you know me, you would realize that this idea flies in the face of all my financial and economic education).
So, I know the idea going through your mind is "What's Jamie going to do about it?"
I'm going to write letters to my Senators and Congressman, I'm going to become more and better informed. I'm going to write to the President.
P.s. And don't worry. I'm not going to go on the "Free Tibet" campaign....yet.
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
Experiment
I'm going to start living on half my income. It officially started on Monday and I'll see how long I can last. It shouldn't be too hard as I was a finance major in college and I play with money all day long. I won't eat out every meal, I'll only go to the mountains on the weekend using free lift tickets, and I won't blow a whole paycheck on a painting. (Yes, I love art. Support the arts!)
So yes. I'm now living below poverty. I guess I'll see what happens. Ideally I'm living on half my income so that when I do get accepted to the Peace Corps, I can quit my hell hole of a job and work at Starbucks.
Yep, right now that's my aspriration. To become slightly bohemian and work at a coffee shop. It doesn't make sense to stay at my job if I know I'm leaving. And besides, it would be fun. Ok, it would also be irresponsible, but that's part of the fun.
Dream Big.
Thursday, January 24, 2008
Tomorrow....
And I will be 26. Ok, I can't hyperventilate. I just can't. 26 means that I'm not in my early 20's anymore. I'm going to be in my late 20s.... Oh Crap!!!
Turning 25 was a mild heart attack. And that was only because my mom got married when she was 25 and I wasn't even dating anyone. (And for some reason that was a big deal for me to get married before I was 25) But I got over my insecurities and braved my fears of being single. And I can now honestly say that I'm happy to be adventerously single.
Yes, 25 was a good year. But it was a hard year. I learned lots of difficult lessons including:
* When do you help someone out and when do you just let them face the consequences of their actions?
* Who am I and do I really like the person that I've become? (I realized who I was, and I realized that I really didn't like the person I became, so I wised up, learned more about who I want to become and changed for the better)
* Being content in all circumstances. (Single, dating, friends, friends with benefits.... ok, scratch that last one. Friends with benefits just sucks and I don't recommend it at all)
* Which would lead me to the last huge, large lesson that was the hardest to learn. Teaching myself that I deserve better than what I settle for. That I'm worth it. Yeah cliched but so true. (Props to Doug on this one!)
So all this to say that 25 was a good year, a hard year, but one worth going through.
If I had to make a soundtrack for 25, it would include copious amounts of Bright Eyes, Derek & the Dominoes, Coldplay, Smashing Pumpkins and oddly Andrea Bocelli.
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
"Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will
be exalted in the earth." Psalm 46:10

It's a saying that's been resonating in my brain for a good month. I don't really understand it nor know what it means. But I think the first two words are key: "Be still".
I'm not still very often. Most of the time my schedule is so jam packed that I had to go out and buy a planner. Yes, a planner. Like the one we used in college.
So for now I'm trying to learn what being still would look like for me. Maybe it's just taking time at the end of the day to journal or maybe it's just taking those adventurous hikes were I end up getting lost and stalked by mountain lions.
Whatever it is, I need to do it. Just to be still and know that He is God. (Not me).
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
Cold Showers
So the Russian Roulette had been spun, and I was the lucky one.
First of all, nothing wakes you up quite like a cold shower. Your teeth chatter and really the only good thing that comes from it is that your hair usually looks more shiny.
I can't complain too much though. Cause on most days I do have hot running water. And I have running water 24/7 be it hot or cold.
That can't be said in alot of places of the world. Yeah, they might have running water, but not all the time. And they probably don't have heated water.
So I guess this is a post about being thankful for what I have. And for a cold shower to make me realize it all.